oh god oh god were all gunna die

hi all

its been an age since i last posted, and a lot has been going on in the world of nathon. so let me fill you in. after my last posts i got a girl. YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

shes awsome!!. she means the world to me. i have fallen head, shoulders and knees let alone heels for this girl. shes my princess. and she just agreed to be my wife. so. I AM ENGAGED!!!!!!!!!!

the kanji means together.

just doing my bit to tell the whole world im happy

bye.

Hello

I would like to once and for all make a statement about something that has been bothering me for a goodly while. Around new years upset a friend of my very badly. I didn’t know how until one of my other friends pointed the problem out, it appeared as though I was plagiarising his personal thoughts, something I assure him I had no intention of doing.... ever. I have since gotten rid of the said offending material because his was there first. I make a full penitence for any harm caused. And will forever be sorry for the hurt it might have caused. I only hope we can remain friends.

Sincerely

Nathon

Well howdy do

I dear readers have a job interview tomorrow.:D

Its at the local meat works, should be great. I decided to take a year off study and work my but off. I need the money really badly. I want to buy either a Honda cb 250 or a VTR 250 v2 twin sport. Very nice bikes. So ill have to save my ass of. Uni restarts in a week, kinda scared to see my friends again. Wronged a few of them and one is moving into my house, may end up regretting telling her that the room was available. Oh well life goes on eh. Really want this job; so keep all your fingers crossed

And in the words of Groucho marks

"I don’t want to belong to a club that would accept me as a member"

bye

Well howdy do

I was recently going through some of my old things the other day and I came across an old paper clipping. It was a study from some science mob saying that its not wise to keep teddy bears in cots with your babies, as the fur in modern teddy’s collects dust and bacteria that can potentially cause your baby to become ill.

If you go down to the woods today....

You’re sure of a big surprise....

If you go down to the woods today....

You’re possibly going to die

Cause today’s the day

If ever there was

Today’s the day that you die because

Today’s the day the teddy bears spread there sick...ness

Scary stuff.

Do you have a teddy?

well howdy do

good day all, well....i got drunk. again. shit. went out with a few of the rugby boys for a wee beverage, and had a few to many, a lot too many actualy. to be frank i got shit faced. not good, ended up in a punchup, some 18 yr old. not even sure why, cant actualy remember doing it but have been told i did, but i won so thats what counts. oh dear. should not be aloud to drink...ever. oh well. could have been worse i spose. any way, best be off to bed.

and in the words of ugly dave gray
"if ya nose runs and ya feet smell your upside down"

later

Hello boys and girls

Today we continue our story on the fruitcake trapped in the land of pudding.

The fruitcake awoke to an eerie feeling. Like when you’re in a group of people and someone farts. He sat up rubbed the crumbs out of his eyes, burped, broke wind and took stock of himself. "Were in the name of walnuts am I" he muttered as he looked at his surroundings. Three walls were made of marzipan and one of musk sticks. "Shit, I’ve been nicked...again".

The mayor of mixedfruitberg was calmly sitting in his office when the phone rang. "Hello, oh its awake then, right, right ill just finish this deposition and be right there" he hung up the phone and turned back to his deposition. He had to retrieve this particular sheet of paper from the dustiest section of the storage room. "20 years, 20 years and it happens again when I’m in charge, soggy thing"
The mayor told himself under his breath "my father always warned me of it, could happen again he said, best to prevent it he said" the mayor signed the last page and collected his hot on the way out.

The fruitcake was sitting up trying to figure out how he had gone from Cindi cashews bedroom to the nick when the outer door was opened. A portly looking figure walked slowly in to the half light, "what’s this then" thought the fruit cake "bit of a fat fucker eh" he stood up and walked to the musk bars. "S'up" said the fruitcake. The mayor turned a slightly darker shade of tan and replied, "good morning...you". "Look Cindi told me she was 16 and any way I was only helping her out with her home work..."the fruit cake began "silence" yelled the mayor "you will be silent, I ask the questions here if you want to ask question you must first apply in writing." the fruit cake turned pale, "no I cant be, how could I, I was, but, why, tits" the fruit cake stammered as he realised what had happened. "What’s your name if you things have one?" inquired the mayor. "I’m Freddy,” answered the fruitcake "I’m Freddy...the only fruitcake in the land of pudding" and Freddy wept.

well howdy do

folks on some good advice from a freind (thanks moon) i have made a bonni wee change in my life. i bought a dog! an 8 week old female pug dog to be precise. shes a dear little thing, likes to chew shit up and is already house trained! shes fkin cool, (from now on will have to censa all my blogs as one of my freinds reads off a pc with filters on it). she will get under ya feet and you will invariably step on her at least once a day. stayed at my sisters house last night, she lives with her boyfreind, they only just moved in together last week and she was already talking about dumping him. i mean what the shat? they had a big fight when i was there (we were all drunk to) which is not cool, god i wish i could make her see what a fking dkhead shes being, selfish tart. any hoo ive got to get to bed and catch some

qoutes qoutes ummm......oh got a good one

in the words of my grandma (and yes she did say this)
"shohn" (my fatheractualy spent and prononced john) "look at this girl shes got tits like an empty penny purse"

bye

Good morrow

I must say my piece and my piece must be said, first I hold no ill will against any one, (tho the Oliver comment kinda hurt) sindios, firefly, megs the neighbours chickens who keep invading my garden, no ill feelings. I’m not a monster who gets pissed for no reason, and had know intention of driving sindios and firefly apart, having said that said that I may have done a few things that weren’t thought out well, but tis not a crime. I do understand that different people want different things, some people (like me) are commitment people, date for a while move in together let’s get a dog people. Given that I’m only 21 this may seem a little strange but that’s just the way I am. Other people aren’t its that simple. There’s no point in getting angry over something that I cant change. I still love firefly and probably always will, but if you want different things there’s no point beating your head against a wall trying to change or change someone else. I don’t get mad when girls don’t want to date me, I can’t change their feelings, I have no control of them. So. Am sad that it turned out this way and hope we can stay friends, with everyone sindios, firefly even those blasted chickens (well.... maybe not the chickens) so. Will be sad......will brood for a while..........will put it behind me, I’m a big boy I can deal with it. If you guys don’t want to see me anymore that’s fine to, I understand, all I ask is that you speak your mind say what you feel and tell it like it is. I need to hear it like that because other wise I just don’t get the hint.

And in the words of Monty pythons

" A five ounce bird cannot carry a one pound coconut"
Bye

hello

Recent events have got me thinking people. They have got me thinking that I am slowly becoming some sort of recluse. In previous years, and months even I would have enjoyed nothing more than going out and having fun with friends and family. But of late I find that leaving the sanctity of my humble abode is a chore not worth accomplishing. I fear that my long period of lethargic apathy may lead to a place I’m not entirely comfortable with. I do not wish to be some perverted hermit living in the slums and back woods of Australia, but I cannot get over that fact that people are arseholes. Everywhere I turn I see arseholes and pricks that cause me much distress and evoke desires of homicide and grievous bodily harm. It seems easier to avoid people then to deal with the daily pleasantries of life in the public. I am afraid for my sanity, as I have never been before folks. I am scared, alone and rapidly running out of options with which to deal with this problem. I ask you is this a symptom of a mind starved for to long of human contact, or are the majority of people in this world just shit? I fear it may be that I am just a self-indulgent twat pedalling useless and pointless drivel (because the internet really doesn’t have enough pointless drivel). Is he crazy you ask, well yes! We’re all a little crazy; we have to be I certainly can’t be the only one.

And if I am the only one......well
Bapabooi bapabooi Howard sterns penis bapabooi bapabooi

Hello boys and girls

Today we will hear the story of a cake trapped in the land of pudding.
Our tale begins in the sleepy little place called mixedfruitberg, home to 12,200 puddings precisely. It’s a dry sort of place a bit like an English merchant bankers convention. Every thing in its proper place and everything accounted for. Down the main street, glazed cherry blvd there’s not a cashew nut out of place or a scruffy looking sultana to be seen anywhere. Its 4 in the morning and it is completely dark (the powers that be had a meeting and the majority voted to extinguish street lights after 11 to save money) no wind blows as it did not acquire the proper permit to blow after 7pm. suddenly a flash, a shriek, a bellowed oath and a small cake appeared on the street steaming slightly. At precisely 6:45 am the next morning, the wake up bell sounded and the town began the orderly procession to work. The town clock read 7:00 am on the dot (the towns committee requisitioned an atomic clock as they always keep perfect time) when the people of mixedfruitberg stepped out of their homes and froze. The sound of thunderous snoring and other bodily noises issued from what most dared not think in the early morning fog (the fog having pre booked and applied to appear at this time and date 3 months before handing in all forms in triplicate). The cake was aware of a strange noise kinda like the sound of a beater on low power, he lifted his head and uttered "fug orf we ya" and rolled over. Now mixedfruiteans, who are not normally accustomed to disorder and bad language (be it intelligible or not) where quite perturbed at this strange turn of events. Who was this?........ What was this?.........surly he doesn’t have the proper permit. Another tremendous snore rocked the onlookers as the strange object rolled on to its back (when I say back I mean the flattest part as he was completely cylindrical in shape) the mixedfruiteans looked appalled as they realised what this thing was. The mayor of mixedfruitberg (having won the right to be mayor by filling in all his standard bribe forms correctly) slowly walked out to the prostrate figure in the dustless main street (the dust, having made a rudimentary signing error on one of its permit forms was forbidden to work today). With a stick in his hand the mayor strode up to the cake in the street and poked him once quite hard in side, "I swear she was 16" moaned the cake and rolled away from the attack on his slumber. The mayor turned an interesting shade of orange (which is an amazing feat for a pudding) and walked back into his office muttering, "Where are those soggy arresting vagabond forms".

Tune in next time for the continued adventures of a cake trapped in the land of pudding.

And in the immortal words of Monty python
"Drop your panties sir William I cannot wait till lunch time"